Change is the only thing which is inevitable in life and we still end up facing it with denial. Every living thing on this earth goes through changes and as humans we have the capacity to understand it too. There are times in life when we have to face only some minor change but we also go through major changes in life. It could be marriage, divorce, having a child, loss of a loved one, shifting to a new place, change in job or even profession. So, here I’m today contemplating over Change as an emotion.
I tried breaking to the core reason as to why we get so stressed over changes in life. It is the insecurity and uncertainty around it. Does getting overwhelmed and losing sleep over it helps? I have gone through such phases in life and I can say that getting stressed over it doesn’t help at all. It only makes the situation even more worse. So, how do we deal with changes in life?
Acceptance – As humans, the first thing which comes to our mind is denial. We deny accepting the changes and end up confusing ourselves more. Take a deep breath and sleep over it in such times. Accept the fact that changes in life are good for you.
Even a good change can cause stress – Having a baby and becoming a mother has been the most happiest moment in life. It was not easy for me to deal with it. I had complications during pregnancy and had to be on complete bed rest. At the same time, my mother got cancer. So, I was dealing with multiple emotions and I could have freaked out. Somehow I stabilized myself to cope up with the situation and delivered a healthy baby. The only way I could deal with such a situation was by staying calm and positive. I found peace by listening to soothing music. I engaged my mind with art work. I still smile looking at those little things I made for my baby. So, do what makes you peaceful when stressed out.
Write, write and write – I’m a writer and preach about it all the time. Penning down your thoughts help a lot. Even I tend to react to situations with overwhelming emotions. Even changing a job or moving to a new city can be stressful. Write down all the positives and negatives and you will find the answer.
Take time to deal with grief and death – Dealing with a bad change is hard. It could be loss of a loved one or end of a relationship. It was real hard for me when my mother passed away. Me and my family spent nearly 5 years fighting cancer with her. It was one of the toughest times in my life. I saw cancer taking a toll on my mom and her reactions to chemo and radiations. I was travelling frequently with a small kid in hand to be with my mom and ended up being away from my husband for long periods. So, when my mother passed away, it hit me hard. I felt as if God is so unfair and all my efforts have gone waste. The only way I felt like I could make it up to her was to plan the best funeral that I could possibly plan. After years of battling cancer, this is the least she deserved. Unfortunately, she hadn’t taken the time to learn more about Final expense insurance and how her funeral expenses would be covered in her policy. But that’s ok. You could say that I’ve planned for this moment since her diagnosis, so I already had a plan in place. Don’t get me wrong, it would’ve helped, but this is the card we were dealt. It definitely didn’t make things easier though. We are grateful to our friends and family who extended us support by sending sympathy gifts for loss of mother and being there for us when we needed them the most. However, the only way I could deal with it all was by taking time out. I was off social media and even took a solo trip. Sometimes you need your own space. Trust me that you will ultimately cope up with the loss and smile again.
So, change, it happens. It happens even before we know. Sometimes it takes a long time for the change to happen and then there are times when it happens over a day. We live, we breathe through it. We hope that this change brings us joy, fulfills our dreams and even change the way we are itself forever. Good or bad, change is constant in life.